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Slaughter Disc

Enough to Scare the Be"jizzus" outta you!

Starring Caroline Pierce, Robert Williams, Jewels Mackenzie, Travis Lee, Albin Kinsey, Kristen Quitmeyer, Gabe Messer, Ashley Rees and Chris Spoto.
Directed by David Quitmeyer
Will Appeal To: Horror fans and chronic masturbators.
Steel Web Productions
2004

Eeeeeeek! This isn’t a porn movie with a vague horror plot or pseudo-goth look. It’s a genuine horror movie with explicit sex scenes. Which makes it a whole different genre for me and thus a bit more difficult to review. I’ll start by getting the porn out of the way. There’s a whole lotta masturbation, since that’s the “crux” of the plot—and yes, there is one! The film’s starlet, Caroline Pierce as the stunningly scary Andromeda Strange, performs some impressive fellatio and fucks a few lucky stiffs, but again, the sex really isn’t the be-all end-all here. It’s more like, er, frosting on the cake. Or perhaps blood on the fang. Whatever.

Andromeda masturbates with a fiendish dildo that I immediately recognized as one of Divine Interventions’ devilish designs, specifically their “Grim Reaper.” It’s bone white and, midway through her ministrations, she begins oozing blood, which contrasts chillingly with the dildo. This is the first tip-off that the movie isn’t your run-of-the-mill porno. In fact, if you have a problem with blood and/or gore, your willy will probably wilt halfway through. But if you’re a big fan of frightfests, forge ahead! Because this is one disturbing DVD!

Mike is our star masturbator; seems he has a slight porn addiction problem that goes hand-in-hand (ahem!) with his chronic masturbation. When he purchases a DVD starring Andromeda Strange, all hell breaks loose. Literally. What begins as one more inspirational piece of pud-pulling porn transforms into a mysterious disc that takes on a life of its own, and our man Mike is helpless to stop it. Obviously, much blood and sex ensues.

Without giving away the impressively intricate plot, I can say that it is very clever and pretty damn scary. And, with the five sex scenes, hot as hell, too!

In that it isn’t “straight” porn, I feel obligated to offer some actual film criticism. The movie is incredibly well done, considering the meager budget. If this had had as little as a $100,000 budget, you might be seeing it at your local cineplex instead of on your home DVD player. Well, minus the sex scenes, maybe. But it’s that good. Of course, a re-make with that $100,000 would be even better. In my opinion, it would have to be shot somewhere scarier. San Diego isn’t exactly the goth capitol. It’s tough to get into a spooky mood when the sun is shining, the sky is blue and the palm trees are swaying. Also, it might be easier to achieve a gritty feel with divier sets; the protagonist’s apartment is surprisingly bright and shiny, especially for a slacker. And I won’t even bother harping on the fact that most lazy ass chronic masturbators probably don’t own whiz-bang flat-screen high def televisions.

But distracting details aside, this is a fuckin’ excellent film. I can’t say it’s one I would jerk off to while watching, but I really enjoyed it. It’s the first thing I’ve ever seen that is truly cross-genre: horror with hard core sex. When David Quitmeyer, the films’ writer and director, initially gave me the “elevator pitch” of Slaughter Disc, I said, “Oh, like The Ring.” He acknowledged that one might draw a parallel, but that his concept pre-dated The Ring by 15 years. I watched The Ring and hated it, frankly, so I can say, with great relief, that the only similarity between the two is the plots’ vehicle: a movie. Any comparison ends there. And of course, no one gets their dick sucked in The Ring!

I asked David what it cost him to film the flick and how long the shoot took. “Slaughter Disc was filmed on a budget of $9,000. It took about two weeks total to film, but that time frame was spread out over two months.” And what about this being a whole new genre? It may be for me, but David says otherwise, as he explains the film’s roots and inspirations. “Personally I consider the movie an ‘erotic horror story;’ everything is driven by the plot. There were some porn-horror movies in the early 70's and 80's, so this concept isn't exactly new. The story is more inspired by story collections such as Hot Blood or Clive Barker's earlier works in the Books of Blood. I do get a lot of people telling me that they don't like porn but they love this movie.”

And what about similar features in the future? Quitmeyer tells me, “The real goal of Slaughter Disc is to introduce people to this type of storytelling and then gradually become more progressive with the gore and sex. Think of it as sticking your toes into an icy pool and with the next story we'll jump in over our heads!” David, we can’t wait!

[Written April 2005]